Even miracles take a little time.

So this is something I have been contemplating for a while, publicly blogging our journey. I can't promise I will keep up with it though, I love the idea of blogging I like documenting every moment of our life and our journey. I have always been a writer. I want our child to know that they were a miracle and I want the world to know. And you know maybe, someone will learn something or maybe someone in our shoes will feel less alone. If it wasn't for all of your constant love and support I would not have the courage to speak out, it means so much to me to receive the messages of encouragement from people I haven't spoken to in years, or seeing people hash tag Team Baby Denman as support it makes my heart so full you have no idea what you do for me every day.

Time is a funny thing. God's timing specifically, it's been weighing on my mind alot lately.
Some of you know that around this time last year we'd decided we were "doing it at the wrong time" and that's why after some time we weren't preggers. So we charted every nitty gritty detail last November and we were sure we'd conceived our Christmas miracle. Our last baby free Christmas we called it we were so confident you can imagine our devastation when a week before Christmas yet another negative. And then this year rocked our worlds. The tests, the needles, the poking, the probing (yes probing), the procedures, appointments, the pills and their side effects this has definitely been a year I wont easily forget.

That being said, it's been a year and we are still crossing our fingers for the lingering hope that this round works and we get our Christmas miracle yet again. But this year it's with a wiser mind set.

I feel like everything in our relationship has led us to this point. Everything in our lives! We are where we're supposed to be even though it hurts sometimes. Taylor and I met at 15 and 16 and were married just shy of two years post high school. People said we rushed it but we disagree I know he's the only guy for me, he's the father of my future children and he's who I will lay my head down to at night every night for the rest of my nights. And I can only imagine he feels the same about me. The plan had always been 2 by 25 and we're done! We want to enjoy our children as they age and we wanted our parents to be able to enjoy our children and our grandparents. We got married, we have the financial means, we have the "nursery" that is currently our dogs room lol. It should've all fallen into place perfectly. But it didn't.

But I think we're where God wants us to be. He wants us to fight this fight to build us into the perfect parents for those babies we are so anxiously awaiting. So maybe we wont be done by 25 maybe we will have one, or maybe twins! (Side note that would be AMAZING so if you pray for us you know what to do lol). But while our plan on our time went astray, God's plan has always put us right where it needed us.  I feel like everyday I am becoming more at peace with this.

So while it's been a hard year, it's been nothing short of a fabulous year!